I have been nothing but a cranky bum the past few days and I noticed in my calendar that is that week of pms. It was almost a relief to see, as if it’s a reason or excuse for me to completely lose it. The truth is I don’t want to continuously lose it and it really didn’t change my behaviour when I realized I had a few more hormones then usual this time of the month, but I do want to release all this anger.
Today is a gorgeous day, a rare gem hidden during winter time where it is actually warm and beautiful with the sun shining down. I decided this morning that I don’t want to be a grump so I made sure to meditate (which really does help) and I felt compelled to get outside and run. I even did my old route that I used to do pre-children because I am working right now on loving myself and told myself to have confidence in myself for this run. It was during the run that I felt connected to my mind, my body and my spirit (being myself and the greater spirit all around me – Mother Nature) . I realized that I am on a journey of self love and self discovery and that needs to be rooted deep in my feminine spirit.
As I ran, I thought my journey is that of a female voice. I am learning and thinking about spiritual practice and I am realizing that the culture that I am a part of is one where the female is seen as weak. I also understand that there are cultures that celebrate femininity and see females as a source of power and great insight. These cultures celebrate every part of being female and see the great insight from it. This is too how I wish to see it. If I wish to operate from this spot I need to look at all aspects of my feminity in a positive way. I need to see my pms as a time of heightened sense of emotions and not all of those emotions are bad, there are many good ones that allows me to also feel great joy, love and connection. I have read and I have come to understand it to be true, that this is a time of great creativity and connectivity – I have a great and deep perception right now and it’s time to honour that. The month will circle through a variety of emotions but now is the time to be creative and celebrate my feminity.
It’s no wonder my run sparked these emotions because I am connecting to a great feminine spirit – Mother Nature. I feel so alive when I do so because it’s when I am truly connecting to me.